This past weekend was spent up in the D.C. area with my Aunt Joni, celebrating Thanksgiving. Usually, my Uncle would be there with us, but he has been in Alabama for the past six weeks taking care of his mother. It seems as though recently, everyone who could potentially get injured or sick has. The thought of losing those close to me is still fresh in my mind, but not necessarily in a sad way; the notion certainly puts things in perspective. The past few years of my life have taught me to say what I mean more often, or do what I want, or make decisions for myself. I don't consider this being selfish. I believe that in the end, when one lives his or her life in a false way, more people will end up hurt than if the truth is brought out at first. But this has nothing to do with Thanksgiving.
BACK TO THANKSGIVING: Even though I've been at school for almost a year and a half, I feel a though this year I am truly more homesick than last. My first year, I was still unsure of where I was going, how I was supposed to function on my own, etc. But after evolving more as a person, I have found things that I know truly make me happy. I have more respect for my family, for my home, for everything I have left, and knowing that it's still there while I am so far away is difficult. Although my relationship with my aunt is quickly growing stronger, the past month and a half have brought up events that have made being away from my immediate family extremely difficult. The idea of being away from those I hold dearest is frightening, yes, but more than anything it is simply... empty. A hollow feeling is adopted into myself when I'm away, and it is difficult.
However, I've learned to use the negative emotions to drive myself. Although I am not where I want to be as a student, or friend, or leader, or anything, I know I'm well on my way. If I had stayed in Seattle for college, I know I would have learned a huge amount; nevertheless, I know as a human being I wouldn't have grown as much as I have by being here.
